Something in a relationship

 

A good friend of mine said – “The person with whom you can be yourself, be it happy or sad, together or alone, is the one you should be with”; and this kept me thinking all the while as I was walking back to my room. She said this as an answer when I asked her – “What is that one thing that you have learned from your relationship”.

As I said that it kept me thinking; not because it revealed something that I did not realise, but because it led me to one more doubt. I have known myself for couple of years now and still there are times when I surprise myself. I surprise myself with my intuitions, reactions and choices that I make. And every time it happens I keep wondering if I know myself. Now if for some reason no one can know what constitutes oneself, I wonder, how can one decide about the person he or she is going to be with?

But does that mean I believe in fate, frankly I cannot say that but I would very well not like to believe that two invisible set of hands have written my life. So in the matter of relationships I do feel the same way. I must say I have been lucky to find people who are truly amazing. Few of them are a kind who gave me a sensation of a typical sort of feeling. I don’t know how to word that feeling but one thing that I remember about that feeling; my head was empty, there was no single thought running and my lips stretched to the extent to be called a smile whenever I saw them. Few of them made me feel so perfectly secured by my identity and for few of them my identity did not matter at all.

To me life is not a sacrifice, especially sacrifice of ones individuality. To me no one can determine the perfect partner in life; the degree, certificates and bank balance never can. To me I know I am with a right partner when I can respect her before I could love her; I would not feel a tinge when I have to share my favourite chocolate with her, I may be the ultimate but there is a sense of incompleteness if I cannot share with her and for the most important thing, I could be able to see in her eyes and know for the fact that she is my friend, my wife and the woman whom I wish to be the mother of my child.

Well that’s what I had to say over my coffee tonight. 

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